BREWER: Adnams, Suffolk, England


ABV: 4%

VESSEL: 330ml tin

TWITTER: @Adnams


DATE OF POST: 24th April 2020


Well, when it comes to Cucumbers, Melons and Sours I have pretty strong personal opinions on all. So when Adnams put all three together those strong opinions really started to manifest themselves together in quite a way. Questions about how this could work and would it be a tasty brew were flying about in my… melon

Melons – I don’t really like melons. Nor can I eat them as my bod is definitely intolerant to them. My friends found out about this on a trip to Spain once. When out for an early dinner I consumed some sort of fruit salad not realising that it contained melon.

I’m sure my pals were trying to call for help as their friend was in trouble what with his throat swelling up and stuff but it just seemed to be that they were laughing too much. Once the episode was over and I told them that eating fresh oranges made my lips swell up they really lost their s**t.

Cucumbers – It’s not that I don’t like cucumbers, they’re fine, but they are not much more than that. That wet mess in the middle of them has always seemed unnecessary to me. With it removed the cumber is nice enough to consume but with it the whole experience is pretty bland.

Sours – I. Flippin. LOVE. Sours.. if done well of course. If I find myself momentarily blinded due to my body twitching so much from the high tart level of a sour then Jymi is a happy boy.

So how did Cucumelon Sour stack up?

Let’s take this sip by sip…

First sip made these thoughts happen in my head. “Blimey, that tastes like cucumber”!

From there I thought,well, this could be nice and refreshing but I wasn’t picking up any sour really. If you’re going to label something a sour it needs to be sour. So heading into sip two I thought, if I can pick up on some sour here with the refreshing taste of cucumber too we may be onto something.

Nope, sip two was a disaster. It’s not sour. It just tastes like cucumber. It’s terrible.

From there I lost my mind slightly. Whether it was based on frustration, a lockdown wobble or disappointment who knows, but I just chinned the rest of the glass in one. Bizarre. I think I just wanted it to be over… and thank gawd it is.

Jymi’s Rating: 27%


Now, sour is not everyone’s style of beer. If I were to conduct a straw poll with my friends, it would only be me and Jymi that liked them. However, we must assume that others out there do like sours because if they didn’t, then there wouldn’t be a market for them.

The idea of cucumber and melon as a sour is interesting. I’m not saying I’m against it. It’s just interesting. And it does smell of cucumber, with a little bit of melon. That’s no mean feat, to pack in such aromas in the nose.

Then, when you drink Cucumelon, you get the cucumber. And melons there too. but the sour part is absent. It’s not there. Not existent. And the problem is, cucumber and melon beer (without the sour) is pretty awful. It’s like a gimmick. A novelty. Terrible.

If you’re going to make a sour, make a sour. Do it properly. Don’t scrimp. Don’t hold back. Because if you don’t go for it, you’ll end up with something so wishy washy, it’s not worth the can that it’s held in.

And, so, here we are, Cucumelon started off so well. But it ended disastrously. I had great hopes for this beer. But they were dashed. Shredded. Trodden into the ground.

This does not even come close to the great sours out there. It’s not a sour so don’t be fooled!


Sammy’s Rating: 29%



The Virus has not helped the MOB SQUAD this time round… We have had a few words for CLOCKWORK TANGERINE but we’re understandably down on normal numbers. If you happen to find yourself faced with a tin on your next trip to the supermarket then grab one as words don’t go out for another three weeks.
Stay safe

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